I was worried for a while that I would never be able to work full-time. Between my physical and emotional problems, I didn’t have the drive or motivation to do really anything. Things are different now, though. I’m not depressed as much, and I feel driven to work and get an education. I feel like I can make it.
I have been faced with a lot of pain and misfortune in my life, and I held onto all of that pain for so long that I didn’t have room for anything good to happen. Once I started to let go of it a little bit at a time, things started to look brighter and I knew I was heading in the right direction.
I have goals and dreams now that are beyond waking up and getting through the day. I get up every morning excited to work and do my schoolwork. Knowing that I was able to make it through my past and get to this point has shown me that I can literally do anything.
Yesterday, I got a call and now I can finally talk about it. I put in an application to be a shift manager at McDonald’s and about an hour later I got a call to set up an interview for 9 AM today.
Between yesterday and this morning, I went from being excited to nervous to being frantic, and those emotions went in a constant loop until I got there and sat down. I won’t go into too much detail, but the interview went perfectly and I start orientation on Sunday!
I am still extremely nervous and excited, and this will open up so many opportunities for me. I feel like everything is moving in the right direction, and nothing will stop me!
I hope everyone has a great weekend, and a wonderful holiday!
Well, it’s done… sort of. I dyed my hair brown. The color didn’t take fully, though, as certain parts are still blue and a majority of my hair now looks teal in certain light. Once it dries, I will take another picture before I start the second round of dyeing.
I haven’t had brown hair in a while. It’s my natural hair color, but I prefer blues, reds and purples. I like this shade, though. I think once it’s not brown with a teal undertone, it’ll look nice. I actually don’t mind the green color, I want to hate it but I don’t.
I have a busy day tomorrow, so I will be trying to get to sleep at a normal hour so I can wake up and get everything done!
Tonight through the rest of the weekend, I will be spending doing work. I want to get a majority of my work out of the way so I can focus on school and getting my creativity back. To do the things I want to do, I must do the things I have to do first.
I did manage to take a nap today, so I will be able to stay up pretty late tonight. I’ve worked hours on end before, I just need the energy for it, which I have right now so I want to take advantage of it. I will give myself until 11 PM and then I will just start working.
Wish me luck!
As of late, a lot of chapters in my life have come to an end and I am now left with a huge blank space to start writing the next passage. I realize now how much I’ve lost my way, which is why I’m going to make a true effort to get back to where I was.
A couple of years ago, I wanted to get into streaming games. I never got around to it, and as more time passed, I just dropped the idea. I am extremely socially awkward, but I figured this could have been a way to get me out of my shell. I’ve decided once I get my desk cleared off and get some of my work done, that I’m going to dive in and try it. Why not? I have nothing to lose and it could be really fun!
Then I started to think about all the other projects I let slip through my fingers. I need to start doing everything I want to do, even if nothing comes of it. I am tired of having regrets and what ifs. I am too young not to do all these things.
I have reached the end of the first week with my rewards chart. I didn’t do everything I needed to do to earn a reward, but I was definitely more productive and I’m proud of myself. I don’t expect I will be fully immersed in my new schedule for another week or so, but I will keep pushing myself until I am.
In all honesty, I’m not too worried about the rewards as much as I’m worried about getting my work done. No, I didn’t do as much as I needed to do but I still did something each day and that’s the whole point of having the chart!
I had a few rough days, and I still managed to get stuff done, which I was never able to do before! I’m going to be working more tonight and into the weekend because I’ve started to feel anxious when I’m not being productive (which is a good thing).
I hope everyone has a great night and a wonderful weekend, and for the Star Wars fans out there, may the fourth be with you!
My plans never pan out the way I want or need them to, so my goal is to work all night until my eyes fall out of my head. Today was rough, but nothing bad can happen when I’m the only one awake. I work better at night anyway, so I have no problem staying up. I took a nap and I have a full supply of caffeine and cupcakes.
Before I buckle in for my coding trip, I will be playing more Stardew Valley and messing around on my ukulele. I need to be relaxed before I even consider booting my virtual machine again.
I hope everyone has a good night, and if any of you are staying up for most of the night, enjoy whatever you’re doing and remember to relax!
Sometimes, things happen that motivate us to get up and push through it all. I had that just now. I was really upset this morning and decided to take a nap. It’s weird how actual dreams have pushed me to keep working on my goals.
I had this dream that I just pushed everything off my desk, got up and just left. I would love to be able to just do whatever I want, whenever I want, and to do that, I need to get through school. I’m three lessons away from finishing the unit I’m on and only two away from being caught up on the new curriculum, which I plan on knocking out once I’m fully awake.
The next thing I need is money, which means I need to work. Once I feel like I’ve done enough school work, I will be making my way through some work and getting some hours in.
I don’t know why such a simple dream makes me feel so driven, but I like it. Maybe when I’m done, I’ll make a dream board so I have a place to put all my goals and dreams for the near future!
Recently, I have been struggling to utilize my time and, because of this, I have become very unmotivated. I started thinking about what used to motivate me when I was younger (outside of my mother dragging me through my school work) and then I remembered something!
When I was about 8 years old, my vision in my left eye was terrible (still is) and the doctor told me and my parents that I would have to wear these stick-on eye patches over my right eye to strengthen my left one. Of course, I fought my parents every step of the way, and I cried every time I had to wear these eye patches… until my mom made the Eye Chart. This chart was made on a bright pink poster board and each day I wore the eye, I got a sticker. At the end of the month, if I wore the patches everyday, we got to go to the local amusement park! It didn’t stop my emotional distress with the whole thing, but working towards something made it easier on me (and my parents).
Now that I’m 22, I have made a new sticker chart. This will keep me motivated to do my work and move at a steady pace through my course. I am hoping to be 75% through my course by the end of July, and to have some money saved up so I can have a bit of freedom. At the end of each week, I will get a reward like a new book or fast food (I’m trying to cut down, and I think having it once a month is a good start).
I’m really excited and I have a good feeling about it. I finally feel like I’m moving forward, instead of making progress while standing still. I don’t care how old I get, if a reward chart works then so be it!
This morning I woke up late, and wrote my morning post later than I usually do. After having a mild freak out and giving myself the third degree, I came to terms with what happened and started to think. I’m the boss and I make the rules. I then started to think about everything I want to do with Rooplixoo.
I want to start making videos and getting personal with the small but beautiful audience I have. I want to bring all of you into my life and on my adventures. I started this blog as motivation to get my life together, and now I use it as a space for my mind to run wild.
I almost gave up on this today, but I took my mistake and I’m turning it into something great. I’m going to keep on this path, creating whatever I come up with.