Slow and Steady

I learned something today… NEVER DO A FULL BODY WORKOUT AT 10 PM. I am happy I forced myself to do it, but I’m definitely going to need it to be a day thing. So the new order is: bathroom stuff, work, exercise, shower, school.

Outside of exercising and doing things other humans do, I left the house and had lunch. I am an attic dweller who forgets to eat, so leaving the house to have food is kind of new territory for me.

Since I got up late today, I lacked a bit of motivation, so I only got a couple of things done on my to-do list. I’m still proud of myself for getting some things done today! I didn’t check off shower, but I did wash off.

For the most part, I’m happy with how today went. There were some problems here and there, but it was overall good. I know I will be sore in the morning, so hopefully getting some rest will prevent a bit of the pain.

A Step in the Right Direction

On January 29, 2018, Paige put a white board on her wall! Not just any white board… a white board with her new routine on it! I probably woke up an hour ago, but my sleep schedule will eventually get better as I follow this routine. I’m not too worried about getting my sleep on track just yet, I just want to have a set of tasks for each day.

On Saturday, I got to see my second cousin, second cousin-in-law, and I finally got to meet my adorable third cousins! It was really fun and I can’t wait to see them again. Sunday, unfortunately, my depression and anxiety went into high gear and I slept all day. I am still a bit shaky and out of it right now, but I’m going to try to work through it.

Back to the board… I have listed everything that I need to do, and things I need to remember to do throughout the day and the week. I will try to set up a habit tracker today, but that’s not exactly at the top of my list.

After I get back from lunch, I will be settling down and getting to work. Since I woke up late, I don’t think I will be able to do a decent amount of work and get 16 lessons done in school, but I will try!

Even though my nerves are shot and my mind is in a million different places, I’m proud of myself. Just putting the board up on my wall is an achievement for me, and I need to remember that every little thing I get done is good.

A Hair Day

For the first time in 6 years, I straightened my hair and I honestly don’t know how to feel about it. I like having it straight because it makes it easier to get out of my face, but I love my curls. It’s taken me years to accept and love my curly, frizzy hair.

When I was in high school, all the “cool” girls had straight hair, so everyone straightened their hair in hopes they would rise through the social hierarchy. For the first two months, I was constantly asked, “Why don’t you straighten your hair?” and told that curls were only meant for formal events. I am one of those people who doesn’t like to be bothered, so I started to straighten my hair in an attempt to fade into the background of the hallways between classes.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t as simple as straightening my hair and it would be straight. I had the joy of straightening my hair and it turning into a static-ridden disaster, which lead to more questions and comments. I learned that I would have to train my hair. Everyday before school, I would wake up at 5 AM, brush my teeth, wash my face, straighten my hair, do my makeup and still be late for the bus (if my mom wasn’t driving me that day). I straightened my hair everyday until my hair lost all of its body. I was finally left alone.

After I left that school and continued my high school education online, that routine stopped. I didn’t have to deal with any comments about anything. It was great. I was actually able to feel confident about something on my body.

Up until today, I have probably straightened my hair about 5 times, and about 3 of those times to make it easier to curl. Another reason I don’t like my hair straight is because my ears stick out slightly, so the curls cover that up!

I’m happy I did this, I got to see how long my hair actually is, but I don’t see myself breaking out my flat-iron for the sake of pin-straight hair anytime soon.

This weekend is going to be a busy one. I will be getting ready to start my new routine! I bought a white board to keep track of things and workout clothes! I hope everyone has an amazing weekend, and I’ll see all of you back here Monday morning!

The Final Draft

I had a productive day… in the sense that it wasn’t very productive at all! I walked around the house and thought about everything I need to do during the day, while I also neglect most of those things.

I start a bunch of projects, and then I get overwhelmed and do nothing. From there, I get anxiety because nothing is getting done, and I get depressed; it’s a fucked up domino effect that needs to change. I feel like I’m lost in a sea of to-do’s and I’m either going to sink or swim… so I’ll try swimming!

When I started Rooplixoo, it was for the sole purpose of getting through all my makeup. Now, it’s taken on a mind of its own because I keep adding new goals. New goals are never a problem, except when they start to stack up and you end up watching 10 hours of videos and reach the end of the day feeling empty. I’m putting my foot down, because what I’m doing isn’t working anymore.

When I was younger, my mom created this beautiful board titled “The Eye Chart”. I am legally blind in my left eye, so when I was younger, the doctors told my parents that I had to wear these stick on eye patches and do exercises to strengthen the vision in my left eye. Now, not much has changed in the sense that I am a stubborn, pain-in-the-ass that marches to a different beat, but I do enjoy rewards and prizes. My mom created this chart and at the end of each week, I would get a prize. I think I got through about 2 weeks before it was retired, but I still continued to fill in all the days with stickers!

I will probably be up all night because I took a nap today, so tonight I will be putting my board together and working. Up above is a draft of what will go on the board. I have started so many things, that I need to remind myself to brush my teeth! I’m not proud of that, but the first step is admitting there’s a problem! I feel if I can get myself on a schedule and stick to it, I will either start to feel better or be so distracted that I won’t have time to feel bad.

I know it’s impossible to plan out every single day and have a perfect routine, but if I nail it at least 4 days out of the week, I’ll be beyond proud of myself. At the end of the day, I have to live with myself. If I have to basically recreate The Eye Chart and reward myself for being a functional human being to get on track, then so be it!

Here’s to yet another new beginning!

What to Do

Today, I will not be doing makeup because my face needs a break from the makeup I used at my dad’s. I don’t know what caused the allergic reaction, but my eyelids are still really dry and itchy. Instead, I will be getting everything finished!

I have way too many loose ends because I like to start 80 things at once, so today I will be knocking out a lot of it! When I woke up today, I had this huge burst of energy and I want to do everything! My plate will be filled with a bullet journal, a daily routine board, work, school and a logo design! I haven’t figured out the order I will do everything in just yet, but I guess I’ll find out soon enough! I have also been neglecting my Instagram, so I need to start keeping up with that, too!

Today is the day that I get my life back on track and try to feel better about waking up every morning. I’m taking back control (again) and I don’t plan on letting go!

Losing Momentum

Yesterday was an experience that I never want to have again. I am allergic to something in that makeup bag, so I can’t do my makeup while I’m here until I get better makeup.

I get very panicky when I go somewhere, even if it’s just for a few days. This time, I forgot my notebook for school and I didn’t bring enough work with me to truly utilize my time. The good thing is that I remembered to bring my laptop and the charging cable, so I can still write on this blog.

In the past, I’ve tried using lists so I remember everything I need to bring with me, but that never worked because I would always forget to put something on the list. My boyfriend has sat in calls with me multiple times asking me if I had everything I needed, and I still fell short. I try to prepare ahead of time, but I’m starting to realize that I just have to go with the flow and try not to worry when I leave something behind.

Since I don’t know what I’m doing today, I guess I’ll start working soon and go from there. The only exciting thing about not knowing what I’m doing is that the second post for today will be a surprise!

The Basics

Today I’m at my dad’s house so I can’t actually do my full day routine here (mostly because I forgot some things at my mom’s house), but I did find my makeup. I have powder, eye shadow, eye liner, mascara, eyelash curler and a lip gloss sword.

I haven’t done my makeup with this little since 10th grade. I never used foundation or more than one brush, so it will be interesting to retry my high school ways! If I remember correctly, the eye shadows don’t give a lot of color so I hope I will be able to layer them.

As a small, very obvious update, I did not change the website around or work on my logo this weekend. This weekend was very rough for me emotionally, and I couldn’t even think about touching this blog. I will hopefully be working on the logo today, and eventually get to the website sometime later this week.

I don’t really have much planned for today, so I’m just going to wing it! I worked so hard on setting up a daily routine that having no plan feels kind of weird. I am currently on Skype and we just finished playing golf. Once the call ends, I guess I’ll just go with the flow!

Happy Monday, everyone!

Into the Weekend

I had a good Friday. I got everything together to set up a daily routine and actually started planning it out! From watching videos to reading articles on how to stick to a schedule, I finally know how I’m going to go about this.

Tonight will be spent creating my daily routine board which will hang on the wall by my stairs. It will be extremely details, listing everything I need to do. From brushing my teeth to blogging and everything in between, there will be a place for it on my board! Now, why does a 22 year-old need a reminded for brushing her teeth? I don’t, but to stay organized throughout my day, it needs to be on the board.

This board is probably going to be a mess of extensive color-coding and miscellaneous tasks, but that’s what I need to stay on track. I have come to the conclusion that I have taken on way to many things and I have started to become overwhelmed. I know I can get everything done that I need to get done, I just need to organize it right.

I hope everyone has a wonderful and relaxing weekend. I will be spending mine finishing off my routine board and sprucing up the website! I can’t wait to come back Monday refreshed and ready to go!